Making a Parenting Plan

Making a Parenting Plan

We mentioned earlier that adoption is a parenting plan. It is a questionnaire that we hope will invoke some thought beyond what you have already considered, help inspire conversation and questions, and invite you to dream and plan beyond today.

These are difficult questions to answer. Please take the time to answer them for yourself honestly and carefully.  Any parenting decision you make, whether it be to parent or place your child for adoption, will be the most important decision you will make in your life and your baby’s. Gather as much information as you can and ask questions.

You can skim over the following questions and/or select the printer friendly version that has the space to write between the lines.

Does parenting a child right now fit the lifestyle I want?

  1. What do I want out of life for myself?
  2. What do I think is important for myself?
  3. Could I handle a child and a job (or school) at the same time? Would I have time and energy for both?
  4. Am I willing to cut back my social life and spend more time at home? Will I miss my free time, my privacy, and my ability to do what I want when I want?
  1. Can I afford to support a child?
  2. List costs of
    • Day care
    • Formula
    • Diapers
    • Clothes
    • Insurance
    • (Note that these costs are for the baby only, you also have to think about, rent, transportation, insurance, food, and recreation for yourself)
  3. How would a child interfere with my own growth and development?
  4. Would a child change my educational plans?
  5. Am I willing to give a great deal of my life (at least 18 years) to be responsible for a child?
  6. Am I willing to devote a large part of my life to being concerned about my child’s well being and to always consider the child’s welfare first before making any decisions?

Do I depend on my parent(s) (or another) for support at this time in my life?

  1. How would a baby fit into my family’s lifestyle?
  2. Is there room in our home for another child?
  3. Would I have to depend on someone else to take care of my child while I continue school and/or get a job? If so, who would this be?
  4. How would I support my child?
  5. How do my parents (or other support person) feel about my child living with them?
  6. Am I ready to take on the day to day responsibility of parenting?
    • Handling my child’s laundry
    • Cleaning up after him/her
    • Taking care of him/her when sick
    • Meeting his/her basic physical and emotional needs
  7. How would I take care of my child’s health and safety? How do I take care of my own?
  8. Am I prepared for lots of advice from parents and others if I decide to parent my child?  Can I handle the criticism?

What do I expect from my child?

  1. Do I expect my child to make my life happy?
  2. Do I want a boy or girl? What if I don’t get what I want?
  3. Will I want my child to be like me?
  4. Am I expecting a perfect child?
  5. Will I want my child to achieve things that I wish I had, but didn’t?
  6. Will parenting a child show others how mature I am?

Would I enjoy being a parent?

  • Do I like children? When I am around children, what do I think or feel about having one around all the time?
  • Do I enjoy teaching others?
  • Am I patient enough to deal with the noise and confusion and the 24 hour a day responsibility of parenting?
  • What kind of time and space do I need for myself?
  • What do I do when I get angry or upset? Would I take things out on my child if I lost my temper?
  • What if I decide to parent my child and find out I made a wrong decision?

Have my partner and I really talked about becoming parents?

  • Does my partner want to have a child?
  • Could we give a child a good home?
  • Is our relationship a happy and strong one?
  • Are we both ready to give our time and energy to raising a child?
  • What would happen if we separated after having our child?

After you feel that you have gathered all of the information you need or can’t think of any other questions to add to your list there are a couple of things you can do at this point:

  1. You are still undecided about what is right for you and your baby and you really want to set up an appointment with our social worker. She will be able to answer your questions and give you some guidance.
    • If this is the case then please contact Adoption Services Inc. using the link at the top of the page and our social worker in your area will contact you as soon as possible.
  2. Feel free to continue on and learn more about adoption specifically
Next: The 5 W’s of Adoption
<< Back to the Top
Website Builder